Monday, March 30, 2009

Earth Hour

Actually wanted to blog about this yesterday, tapi datang Cik E-ya mengacau suruh temankan dia makanlah, tengok tvlah, itu la, ini la ... sampaikan terpaksa ditunda. Tak kisahlah kan janji dapat juga disiapkan hari ni. Here goes...

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Kecoh satu Malaya hari Sabtu lepas pasal 60 Earth Hour. Di tv, for the past week hari-hari ada kempen suruh tutup semua lampu, kipas dan sebagainya selama 1 jam (jerr...) dari pukul 8.30 pm sampailah ke pukul 9.30 pm. Sampaikan budak-budak kecikpun excited tak sabar nak menunggu detik Earth Hour ni. Kita rakyat Malaysia sama-sama diseru untuk menyelamatkan bumi selama satu jam dalam satu hari dari 365 hari atau 8,760 jam yang kita ada dalam setahun. Err... boleh selamatke bumi dengan cara ini? Hemmm ....

So di hari dan waktu yang ditetapkan akupun dah ready-readylah... Bukan ready nak tutup lampu, tapi ready nak skodeng rumah neighbour-neighbour aku samada mereka sama-sama berjuang atau tidak untuk menyelamatkan bumi kita yg katanya dah agak kronik dek perbuatan manusia, termasuk aku. Eii ... malu nyerrr...

Jam menunjukkan pukul 8.40 pm. Akupun mulakan operasi aku. Mula-mula aku buka tv dulu... yelah dah hari hari org tv suruh org lain tutup lampu jd aku nak tengok jugak samaada org-org tv ni jenis orng pandai cakap je atau jenis "walk the talk" kata org. What did I found out? Well, di TV8 aku dapat mesej ni...


Wah kata hatiku, "Bagus bagus bagus ... menyahut seruan betul ni..." Tapi kemudian terfikir pulak. Walaupun tiada siaran tp tak bermakna dia orng kat stesyen tv nun di sana tu tutup semua suis dia orngkan? Yelah kalau tutup semua, mesti mesej mcm di atas tu tak boleh kuar punya... So kesimpulannya - WHAT EARTH HOUR ???

Pencarian aku diteruskan ke saluran tv-tv lain. Yang menjadi target aku kumpulan Media Prima le.. dah dia orng yg bebenor beriya-iya sangat dalam kempen ni. Aku nak tau jugak. So aku pun tekan TV 3, dapat yg ini ...

Tengah buletin utama beb... tengah buat laporan sukan ttng kejayaan si Rizal ni dalam lumba basikal dunia - What Earth Hour???

Lepas tu aku pergi pulak ke saluran TV9, muncul pulak rancangan si Nabil Raja Lawak kat situ ....

Earth Hour?? Lu pikirlah sendiri !

Beralih ke NTV7 , aku dikejutkan pulak dengan muka mamat di bawah ni... Kus semangat... nasib baik tak heart failure...


Betul bang ooi..., Ia amat mengagumkan - Terima kasih

Lepas tu aku boring, dalam hati, "Alah Media Prima ni cakap aje pandai, dia suruh orng bergelap selama 1 jam tp dia sendiri cakap tak serupa bikin. Siap si Dato' Farid Ridhuan tu keluar muka kat TV lg bagi kempen. Ciss Dato' ! You should be ashamed ..." So tak salahlah kalau aku tak ikut kempen Earth Hour nikan? (err...sebenornya nak cari alasan je tu ... hehehe...)

Lepas tu aku buka Channel Hallmark, tengok Oprah lagi baik... Citer pasal orng yg nak kuruskan badan... Macam-macam dibuatnya. Ada yg buat gastric bypass lah, ada yg berdietlah, ada yg ikat saluran perutlah dan ada yg berexercise saja. Walaupun tak kena mengena dgn aku yg dah sedia slim ni, tp aku suka tgok jugk sbb infonya bermanafaat.

Tengok muka orng kaya kat atas tu lagi best dr duduk bergelap ... tp kalau aku amalkan bergelap 1 jam tiap-tiap hari agaknya aku boleh kaya macam Oprah tak?

Sedang duduk best-best tengok TV, tiba tiba ..."Ting ting... ting ting......" Bunyi telefon. Hishhh kacau aje. Sapa pulak mesej ni?? Rupanya dari adik aku. Dalam hati, siap le mesti tak cukup satu SMS dia ni ...

SMS adik : Earth Hour. Dah tutup lampu ke? (Dlm hati aku, "dah mula dah... tazkirah free")

Aku balas : Banyakla.. Kau nak mak ngan abah menjerit? Lagipun kat sini tak de sapapun tutup lampu, tvpun on je. Malaysia boleh huhu. (Orng tua-tua mana di tahunya bende bende mcm gini... Gate umah terbuka sekejap pun dia orng boleh kecoh, ni kan pulak aku tiba-tiba nak padam lampu satu rumah...Nahaiiii!)

SMS Adik : Kami duduk dalam gelap. Pasang lilin je. (tak boleh ku bayangkan mcm mana anak-anak dia yg 4 orng tu duduk dlm gelap. Duduk dlm terangpun ganas.. hihihi)

Aku balas : Eleh.. kena hurung nyamuklah korang huhu.. Eh bukan asap lilinpun boleh sbbkan global warming ke? Haa kena padam gak tu, hihi (ayat provoke gilerrr)

SMS Adik : Asap lilin sikit je. Pasang 1 je. (ayat ngelat, m'cover gilerrr)

Aku balas : 1ke 2ke 3ke contribute gak. Aku asalnya nak drive keluar pusing-pusing KL nak tngk ramai ke take part padam lampu ni tp tringat nanti asap keta aku akan mybbkan global warming so cancel la jwbnya huhu (betul ... tak tipu, tp dah kena warning tak boleh keluar - dr Cik E-Ya)

SMS Adik : Sini ramai tutup lampu (nak menunjukkan org perumahan dia well educated la konon... Chettt!)

Aku balas : Yo la orng Somonyih hebatla (Dia satu famili la tu). Orng Gombak mmg pengganas tak makan saman. (Siapa lg, kalau bukan aku). Dah gi duk diam-diam dlm gelap tu jgn pagi besok korang nyer serombong kapal hitam sudah la hahahaha (Bg yg tak tau, serombong kapal tu maksudnya lobang idung ...)

SMS Adik : Dia TAK JAWAB daaa ...

Untuk membuktikan kepada adik aku yg sememangnya orng-orng di kejiranan aku tak ikutpun Earth Hour akupun mulakan operasi kedua aku "menskodeng" rumah neighbour. Nanti dia dtng umah nak ku tunjukkan kpdnya.

Aku capai kamera ku yg dah siap siaga dr awal td lalu akupun pusing kiri, dapatlah suasana ini:

Lampu di taman permainan sebelah umahpun terang benderang. Nun di hujung sana pulak rumah orng, terang benderang jugak.

Lepastu aku pusing kanan pulak. Snap pulak gambar kat bawah ni.

Kat condo tupun banyak lg yg lampunya terpasang. Macam tak Earth Hour jerr ..


Depan rumah pulak inilah snapshot yg aku dapat ...


Ish ish ish, earth hour apa gaya gini? Dari banyak yg aku tengok, ada la satu yg menyertai kempen. Lampu jalanpun terpasang?


Haaaa ini apa pulak ni kat bawah ni? Tu la... korang mesti dari tadi dok mengutuk aku tak sokong kempen Earth hour kan? Eee ... tak baik tau ... Sapa cakap aku tak sokong? Aku sokong..., sedikit sedikittt...

Ini adalah gambar dalam bilik aku. See.. .. .semua gelap gulita kan? Ada nampak muka aku tak? Aku ber "Earth Hour" kat dalam bilik aku tau. Semua suis lampu, TV, kipas, komputer, printer, scanner, sterika, even plug charger hand phone pun aku offkan tau... tak caya gi tanya cicak yg selalu ada dalam bilik aku tu ...

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Playing with numb3rs

Today I read an article about this lady Jane Goody, whose detailed story I got from reading a link posted by one of the cancer survivor's blog that I frequent. She was a British reality TV star and was dubbed one of it's most hated celebrities after she made derogatory remarks towards the Bollywood star, Shilpa Shetty. You see, ada ke patut this Jane Goody called si Shilpa Shetty tu a “dog,” plus various other racial slurs? Ish, ish, ish.... But I'm not into that. What she did was her business. What I am going to write here is on her cancer and her experience in battling the illness. Actually I've read briefly about her story sometime ago but did not take heed back then. But today, I bersemangat utk bercerita ...

Jane Goody had cervical cancer. When she was diagnosed with it, she was only 27. Actually prior to that in the early 2000s she has had several health scares. She had a pap smear done on her which revealed the presence of abnormal cells, the first possible indicator of cancer. But when she was later tested for ovarian cancer in 2004 and bowel cancer in 2006, she was given the all-clear on each occasion by the doctors. So naturally lah kan she must have thought that she was cancer free.

However after collapsing four times, in early August 2008 she again went in for tests. Then on 19th August 2008 she was finally confirmed that she had cervical cancer. Initially she was only told that her cancer was still at an early stage but when more tests were done, her cancer was suddenly diagnosed as "advanced and life-threatening". Imagine her devastation. Itu kata org putihlaa, kata org Melayu "terperanjat beruk". Lebih kurang gitu le. Yalah.. to be told you have cancer is already bad enough but to be told that it's terminal, hemm believe me... it's unimaginable. I knowlah because that's what I went through 5 months ago...

Referring to Goody, what went wrong during her earlier tests? Salah doktor ke? Tampered results ke? Your guess is as good as mine. Tp orang kata there are so many mysteries of life. I believe cancer is one of them. That must be it. You see, with cancer you can never tell. It's an unpredictable silent killer. Today you are up and well, tomorrow you're not. Fututre? Only God holds the knowledge.

FIY, cervical cancer has an 83% survival rate, but nevertheless it kills more than 800 women each year and is the second most common form of the disease for women under 35 after breast cancer. For Goody, the doctor gave her the survival rate of as low as 65% if she would have an operation followed by chemotherapy. She obliged, had a radical hysterectomy that went well, and then began a course of chemotherapy and radiotherapy.

However on 4th February 2009, Goody's cancer had spread to her liver, bowel and groin. Therefore, the previous estimate of percentage chance of survival was withdrawn and she underwent palliative treatment to prolong her life. On 7th February, Goody was reported to have had undergone another surgery in London, this time to remove a tumour on her bowel. Later on 14th February doctors at the Royal Marsden Hospital in London where she had her treatment, declared her cancer as critical and said that she could be dead within weeks, at the most was unlikely to survive more than a few more months. Goody eventually died in her sleep in the early hours of 22nd March 2009. Exactly 7 months 2 days from the time she was diagnosed.

What has all the above got to do with me? Well, ada kena-mengena sedikit-sedikit, maybe...

Tene tene tene tene tene teneeeee... alah itu bunyi background music macam intro dalam citer Twillight Zone tu lerr. Tiba-tiba je berbunyi mcm gitu tengah aku nak recap balik dalam kepala aku apa yg dah berlaku pada aku for the past 5 months... Deyyy! Apa daaa...? Kalau E-Ya baca ni, mesti dia kata, "Confirmed Acik aku punya fuse dan wire dlm kepala dah ada yg putus dek kena radiotherapy banyak kali". Hemm ... nasib kau la dapat makcik macam aku... hahaha


OK, serious, serious ...

When I first went for treatment, I was diagnosed as having fibroid problem only by the doctors treating me. Not one, but three doctors. They were - one from the private Gynae clinic near my home, another from HKL and the third from Pusrawi.

However later at Pusrawi under general anaesthasia, I had a cervical biopsy done. The doctor reported I have "moderately differentiated adenocarcinoma of the cervix". Itu cakap long handnya, cakap short handnya - cervical cancer. But alas this diagnose was also later proven wrong.

A few days after the biopsy I was again under general anaesthasia for staging and cycstoscopy. It was then I was finally given the correct diagnose of endometrial cancer by the Gynae & Onco specialist who performed the procedure. Itu pun he thought it was just a stage 3C cancer. During that time I was told the treatment for me would be hysterectomy, followed by chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Just as what the doctor prescribed in Goody's case.

Right after the biopsy, I had a swell on my neck. It did not take long to develope. Just overnight, I think. It became very noticeable during my staging and when I was transferred to HUKM, I did FNAC onto it. The swell was also later tested positive for cancer, and thus my stage had suddenly jumped from 3C to 4B. That's when everything was changed.

The first few days in HUKM, in the O & G ward the doctors did nothing. I was left to just rest and be visited by doctors on duty, took a few blood samples, asked the usual daily basic questions of "Macam mana rasa badan, buang air kecil dan besau elok tak and loads of other bla bla bla..." As my stage was a 4B, the doctors scraped hysterectomy for the time being and decided to proceed with chemo instead. Their rationale for doing so was to shrink the tumor first, so that surgery would be a breeze. As for the chemo, well we know what happened to that don't we? Only much later was I told by the doctor that there is actually no effective chemo drug for endometrial cancer. Everything is sort of like trial and error depending on your body tolerance. If the drug works for you, marvellous. If not you may be given other drugs to try or no chemo at all.

Thus with the history of a failed chemo, my case was then taken over by the Onco Unit which later decided to radiate me. I had my first session of radiotherapy in December 2008 and the last, just the previous month of February 2009. To date I have been radiated 50 times front and back at three different spots - pelvic, abdomen and neck to tackle the problem in the uterus, para aortic lymph nodes and neck respectively.

I began to have questions in my mind when the two units treating me, O&G and the Onco Units were at loggerheads with one saying I am operable and the other saying I'm not. Actually there are many questions bugging me. Mingling with other cancer patients during treatment only added up my confusion when almost all of them have had either surgery or chemotherapy prior to radiotherapy. But not me, radiotherapy was my only option. No surgery, no chemotherapy.

I did many read ups on my cancer. I found that endometrial cancer, is not like any other cancer because it occurs within the lining of the uterus, called the endometrium. Even with a pap smear, it does not usually show because cancer of the endometrium begins inside the uterus. As for the risk factors well, normally people who gets endometrial cancer are those who are:

  • Over 50 years of age (I am not there yet)
  • Taking hormone replacement therapy (I do not take any hormone)
  • Obese or having obesity-related conditions, such as diabetes (Hah! Me obese? Kurus keding lagi ada. I'm also not a diabetic person, coz dr dulupun tak suka minum air bergula)
  • Being Caucasian (Walaupun aku bukan Jawa tp aku tetap Melayu...)
  • Taking tamoxifen (Nope. I'm not a breast cancer patient prior to this)
  • Having an inherited form of colorectal cancer (Again, nada ...)
  • Early menstruation, starting before the age of 12 (Pun tak de kena-mengena coz I was a late bloomer. Masa Form 2 aku masih gila main lastik kelawar lagi ngan geng aku)
  • Late menopause, after 52 (sblm sakit manalah aku tahu bila aku nak menopause? Tandapun tak de. Tp sekarang lepas radiotherapy, rasanya dah terpaksa dimenopausekan)
  • Endometrial hyperplasia - increase in the number of cells in the uterine lining; usually not cancerous, but they can develop into cancer over time. (BINGO! This must be the cause. Alas it's my theory only. Doktor tak pernah mentionpun if I contracted cancer because of this. Furthermore the percentage of this happening is very minimal)
  • Never having given birth or a history of infertility (Another BINGO! Again my theory only. Aku tak pernah kahwin mcm mana nak beranak, ye tak? Anak tekak dan anak mata tu aku ada lerr. Infertile? Dulu sebelum sakit? Tak mungkin kot. Tp sekarang sah-sahlah sudah, sbb dah kena radiotherapy...)
But then, there are numerous cases whereby patients don't even fall into any of the risk factors group above but they still get cancer, true or not? Thus, all these risk factors thing is debatable. Not only for endometrial but for other cancers as well.

How does endometrial cancer spreads? If left untreated, the cancer that arises in the lining of the uterus, will eventually invade the wall of the uterus and may involve the cervix. With time, it can grow through the wall of the uterus into the surrounding tissues (the parametrium), the bladder and the rectum.

It can also spread by the lymphatic system to the vagina, fallopian tubes, ovaries, the pelvic and aortic lymph nodes and to the lymph nodes in the groin and above the collarbone. Endometrial cancer can also spread throughout the abdominal cavity and occasionally through the bloodstream to the lung, liver and brain. How rapid it spreads depends on the aggressiveness of the cancer.

My case is a bit unusual. I really and truly thank God the AlMighty for that. True my cancer is aggressive and it did spread through the aortic lymph nodes but it did not affect any other parts or organs near the uterus, except shoots itself straight up to the collarbone. What causes it to spread? UNKNOWN. No wonder the doctors treating me pening ...


As for survival rate, the earlier the stage the greater your chances are of being cured. But again this statistics are also very subjective as I found them to vary from site to site. However on the average, the 5 year survival rates for endometrial cancer by stage are as follows: 75% to 95% for stage 1, 60% - 70% for stage 2, 40% - 60% for stage 3 and less than 5% - 10% for stage 4.

Which category do I fall into? What are my chances for a 5 year survival rate? Well, on my last visit to the O & G, I was told by the doctor that my 5 year survival rate was less than 20%. In other words, my chance to live another five years from the day I was diagnose is pretty slim. I still remember the doctor mentioning it and he even asked me if I understood what that means twice, as I was a bit aloof at the time. I never mentioned this fact before in my previous entries because being a Muslim I believe ajal maut is in God's hands and I have faith in HIM. 5%, 10%, 20% or even 90% are just numb3rs to me. Nothing more. Take a look at Jane Goody's case. She was given a 65% chance of being alive and yet after 7 months she was gone. Was it because of the statistics? No, it was all God's work.

Then there was this one endometrial cancer survivor story that I recently read about. She was given less than 30% of survival rate by the doctor in 2000 when she was first diagnosed. But to date; in 2009 after 9 years, she is still alive and kicking. Again was it because of statistics? No. It is all God's work.

Thus, 20% ke, 5% - 10% ke I don't care. I will try my best to battle this cancer. What will be, well... let it be.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Friday the 13th ....

Walaupun hari ni dah hari Sabtu Friday the 14th, tapi aku nak tulis pasal Friday the 13th... Aku ni bukanlah jenis orang yg percayapun pasal benda-benda mengarut macam Friday the 13th ni. You know... org kata it's bad luck day and all, tapi ntah lah apa yang berlaku kat aku hari Jumaat tu betul betul telah membengangkan aku. Mungkin lebih kepada coincidence je kot dan tak de kena mengenapun dengan Friday the 13th ni.

Begini. The day before iaitu Khamis, aku berhasrat nak withdraw sikit duit dari akaun ASB aku. So aku pun drivelah ke Pejabat Pos Gombak dekat rumah aku tu. Masuk je dalam aku lihat begitu ramai punya orang and since I have another appoinment to fulfill, takut lambat punya pasal, akupun keluar dan made up my mind utk ke *** bank Gombak je.

Sampai di *** bank akupun ambillah borang withdrawal utk di isi. Lepas tu ke kaunter utk ambil nombor giliran. Tiba-tiba datang budak pompuan yang jaga kaunter tu cakap, "Kak, urusan ASB dah tutup". Aku pelik juga. Awalnya tutup. Aku tengok jam baru pukul 3.45 ptg. Akupun cakaplah kat dia, "Belum pukul 4 dah tutup ke?" Budak tu jawab, "Tulah akak lambat sikit aje. Baruuu keejaaap aje tadi tutup... Duit dah habis" What? Aku dengar betul ke ni? Duit dalam bankpun boleh habis ke? Tapi memandangkan malas dah nak bertanya, akupun ucap terima kasih dan keluar bank, lagipun aku ada appoinment lain.

Esoknya Friday 13th. Memandangkan semalamnya tak dapat keluar sbb duit dah habis, hari ni akupun sajalah keluar lebih awal sikit, pukul 11 pg ke bank yang sama utk urusan ASB aku. Kali ni E-Ya ikut sekali dgn aku. Nasib baik, hari ini dapat nombor dan giliran aku 0039. Aku tengok kaunter bank ada lebih 10, tapi hanya 3 saja yg berfungsi. Dua utk urusan biasa bank , satu utk urusan ASB. Yang lain kenapa ditutup, Tuhan aje yg tahu.

Setengah jam aku tunggu utk nombor capai 0038, by logic lepas tu nombor akulah 0039. Tp dah dekat sejam aku tunggu tak dipanggilnya. Aku dah gelisah, merungut dgn E-Ya, "Kenapa tak pangil panggil ni?" E-Ya cakap, "alamat lambat lg lah tu... tak pe kita bagi lagi 10 minit. Kalau tak panggil jg kita balik je lah" Aku bantah sbb aku semalam dah dtg, pun tak dpt, takkan hari ni nak balik pulak. Esoknya dah Sabtu. Lagipun aku malas nak keluar dua tiga kali ni... Nak ke bank lain jauhlah pulak.

Sebelah akupun ada sorang kakak menunggu utk urusan ASB juga dan aku tanya nombor dia, di jawabnya, "0040". Aku cuba-cubalah perhatikan kaunter yg deal dgn ASB tu, dan aku nampak budak pompuan teller tu asyik ke hulu ke hilir je kerjanya. Lepas tu kalau ada org datang kat kaunter dia, dia akan entertain org tu. Aku dah naik gelisah. Jam sekarang dah nak menuju 12.30 tgh hari, aku nak kena beli lauk utk parents aku lagi tp nombor aku tak jugak dipanggil-panggil.

Aku start naik hangin bila aku tengok budak tu dahlah tak panggil nombor aku, tp dia pergi pulak ambil beberapa borang "remittances" depan dia dan kemudian dipanggilnya pulak pelanggan yang dah isi borang tu utk dientertain. Org-org tu masuk lg lambat dr aku pulak tu. Aku pandang kakak sebelah dan cakap, "Teller tu dah lupa ke kewujudan kita?". Kakak tu jawab, "Tu lah, cubalah pergi tanya dia kenapa tak panggil-panggil kita ni."

Akupun bangunlah dr kerusi dan berjalan-jalan depan kaunter budak teller ASB tu. Masa tu dia ada sorang customer. Agaknya dia prasan aku berlegar-legar memegang buku ASB aku depan kaunter dia maka dia pun cakap, "Urusan ASB kita dah tutup ye ..." dgn selambanya. #@@&*! Apaaa....? Semalam aku dtg pukul 3 lebih korang kata dah tutup and fine lah aku tak diberi nombor giliran lagi, tapi hari ni aku masuk dari pukul 11 lagi dan sekarang baru je pukul 12.30 kau org kata dah tutup jugak?! Tapi aku tak menjerit kat situ, walaupun aku rasa macam nak aje...

Aku cuma cakap, "Kalau awak dah tutup, kenapa tak cakap? Saya dah tunggu sejam lebih dah ni ..." Ooi, baik punya budak, bukannya dia nak apologise, malah boleh cakap lagi, "Saya dah tutup kaunter ASB dah untuk hari ni. Akak tak payah tunggu". Ewah-ewah... salahkan aku lah pulak sebab menunggu? Aku pun cakap lagi, "Saya bukan saja-saja tunggu. Saya ada nombor". Akupun tunjukklah nombor giliran aku. Sementara tu kakak sebelah aku pun dah ada sama di sebelah aku tunjuk nombor dia jugak. Masa tulah budak teller tu buat muka merungut, "Ini lah jadinya kalau org kat sana tu tak reti buat kerja" Dia nak salahkan budak yang jaga kaunter nombor pulak. Diapun terjerit panggil budak tu cakap, "Jangan bg lagi nombor ASB, kaunter sini dah tutup".

Agaknya dia bising buat kecoh ada officer dia perasan, officer tu panggil dia ke tepi dan cakap sesuatu. Lepas beb. minit, teller tu balik semula ke kaunter dia dan still with no apologies what so ever, muka kelat cakap kat aku , "Kalau akak nak juga buat urusan ASB akak kena tunggu. Tapi saya tak janji cepatlah sbb sistem kita lembab". Dalam hati aku berkata, "Sistem lembab ke atau kau yg lembab". Tu diaa... aku dah tak boleh tahan marah dah time tu... Dah dia yg tak reti liaise dgn bdak kaunter jaga nombor tu dia nak merungut pulak sbb mcm terpaksa nak layan aku?

Aku pandang muka dia dan cakap,"Tak palah" dan aku campak nombor giliran aku dlm tong sampah. Ntah masuk ntah tidak aku tak tahu sbb aku dah pusing jalan. Ghrrr!!!Gerammm!!! Aku tambah-tambah geram sbb dia buat macam aku pulak yg seolah-olah bersalah. Sbb aku tambah beban dia kena kerja lebih sikit utk entertain urusan aku. Heee... tak pernah aku segeram ini... Dalam kereta banyak-banyak aku beristigafar.

Lepas zohor pulak aku bercadang nak cuba balik ke Pejabat Pos utk buat urusan ASB aku. Aku sampai sana, akupun ambil giliran. Kali ni nombor aku 1479. Aku tengok kat mesin nombor di atas nombornya 1374. Mak datuk... tak kan aku nak tunggu sampai 100 lebih utk giliran aku? Mulanya tunggulah juga dalam 30 minit tp lepas tu tengok nomborpun macam tak bergerak semacam, masih pada 1378 akupun keluar. Kali ni nak cuba pulak pegi MAYBANK Wangsa Maju, sebelah Carrefour.

Aku tak pernah masuk lagi bank ni. Ni first time aku ke situ. Cari kaunter macam tak ada. Kat groundfloor tu cuma ada ATM dan Cash deposit machines aje. Mana kaunter dia ni, kata hati aku. Rupa-rupanya kat first floor. Tapi sebelum sempat aku nak naik aku nampak kat tangga tu tertulis, "Sorry, computer off line" Hemm... sah-sahlah tak boleh buat urusan jugak. So akupun keluar. Pikir mana lagi nak pergi ni...

Tiba-tiba teringat kat dalam Carrefour ada sebuah pejabat pos. Akupun ambil kereta dan buat U turn utk ke Carrefour. Cepat-cepat aku parking sebab waktu dah dekat pukul 3.30 ptg. Sampai je dekat tempat pejabat pos aku nampak ramai orng berkumpul. Ingatkan ramai orng singgah tengok barang-barang yang dijual dekat kedai depan pejabat pos tu, tp rupa-rupanya ramai org tunggu utk urusan dgn pejabat pos... Jawabnya ... yaa ... you guessed it right. Balik rumah je...

Sampai rumah, lepas Asar cadang nak berbloglah pasal appointment aku di HUKM, tuliskan apa yang berlaku pada hari sebelumnya, iatu Khamis. So akupun taiplah berjela-jela, alah ... mcm tak biasa, ngeh he he he.... Lepas tu macam tak de idea nak susun ayat, aku pun stop tapi ntah tersilap ke atau sbb Friday the 13th ke, aku agaknya tertekan button "publish post" instead of "save now". So rasanya posting aku yang bertajuk "Life's not fair?" telah terpublish sekejap without me realizing it. Pagi ni baru aku tersedar. Entry tu kalau sesiapa dah terbaca mesti tergantung punya kan? Sorry le. Ini hari ni aku dah completekan, dan kalau sudi bacalah balik kat bawah tu...

Hemm... apalah malangnya nasib aku hari tu, semua serba tak kena. Friday the 13th or what?

Friday, March 13, 2009

Life's not fair?

Yesterday I went to the O & G clinic for consultation. I was attended by Prof. Hatta. I knew that this was not an ordinary consultation like I used to have before. You see, altho' Prof Hatta was actually supposed to be the doctor attending and treating me, but because of his busy schedule being a lecturer at HUKM as well, he thus referred me to his assistant doctors such as Dr. Suguna, who was then later replaced by Dr. Razzi. I have no problem with this, as I know these doctors are constantly in contact with Prof. Hatta when it comes to making decisions. But seeing Prof. Hatta himself was there in the O & G clinic yesterday nevertheless, did set my heart a little bit pounding.

As E-Ya and me entered the doctor's room, Prof. Hatta already had my file in front of him. He smiled at us and said, "Assalamualaikum". We replied the salam and seated ourselves. Suddenly Prof. Hatta put his left hand on his forehead and sighed. Whoaa... what's all this, I said in my heart.

"Kakak ingat hari tu saya kata nak buat operation pada kakak" he started. I nod my head and he continued. "Begini, nampaknya kita ada sedikit perubahan ..." What now, I said. Again in my heart.

"Saya sebenarnya pening ni". Yup, you read it right. That was what he said. He then continued, "Actually if you had the operation or not there's actually no difference". At that moment I was like"Huh? What do you mean by that?". But again I did not say it loud. Only in my heart, but I guess the confusion must have been reflected on my face for the Prof then continued, "Macam ni... normally cancer such as yours surgery is the first treatment given. In the surgery we will remove the uterus and sorrounding affected lymphnodes. But you had that lump on the neck, remember? Now because it's also cancerous, the Onco unit decided to radiate your uterus first to prevent the cancer from spreading to other parts of the body". OK, that part I understood. It was already explained to me earlier by the oncologist, nothing new.

"Actually we doctors pening macam mana nak treat you.." Yup, you read right again. He used the word "pening" twice already. With that I finally opened my mouth and said, "Cancer macam saya punya ni uncommon ke kat Malaysia ni?" (Cewah... terprasanlah pulak...)

"No, not that uncommon. No doubt in Malaysia most cancer cases of the female reproductive system is the cervical cancer, but endometrial is on the rise. In America in fact, endometrial cancer is the no:4 killer there". Oh OK... Actually that part about the America I already knew as I had read about this somewhere on the net before. But what I'm concerned is what's happening here in Malaysia, not elsewhere. Remembering some other info as well I thus said, "Setahu saya mmng di Western country case endomentrial cancer common, tp in Asia it's not that common, betul ke?"

"Macam yang saya cakap tadi. It's on the rise. Cervical cancer dah lama di ketahui up to the level that we now have vaccine to prevent it. But for endometrial, there is still none. So nanti akan tiba satu ketika kita akan lihat cervical cancer cases going down and endometrial cancer pulak will go up" he added.

He continued, "In your case, our concern was that your cancer was one of the most aggressive that we have ever seen. Remember, when you had the DD&C done at Pusrawi and just a few days later when I did your staging we suddenly saw that you developed a cancerous lump on your neck? That shows how aggressive your cancer is" he paused and looked at me. I almost laughed to see his expression at that time. With his hand still on his forehead, sometimes rubbing across it and talking slow, so politely and all . Err.. You all must be thinking that maybe I have a few screws loose up there in my head. You know ... to be able to still laugh upon hearing such info. Its not that I don't care or anything like that, I don't know...but that's just me...

Prof. Hatta continued, "It's so aggressive, hari ni tak de apa-apa, the next day dah timbul kat leher. So in that sense your case is a bit unusual. Tu yang kami berpeluh tu, tak tau nak tackle macam mana". Oh boy, what was I to say then? If the doctors are pening thinking about it, me? I pulak double pening hearing about it...Seriously at that moment I just did not know what to say except smile ... Boleh ke ...

Prof. Hatta did mentioned he was also afraid that since I've already been radiated, the operation that was suppose to be just a minor one for me, could turn major as it could give serious complications to the nearby organs such as bladder, urethra, rectum or even kidneys. Thus, he asked me whether I wanted to risk all that, or just leave it as it is as my other organs are still OK. To make sure, he wanted me to go for another ultra sound at the Gynae clinic downstairs.

In the ultra sound room I was introduced to a Dr. Mashitah. The first comment she made when seeing me was, "Kurusnya badan..." Yeah.. like I've never heard that before. Hahaha... Like always, my infamous reply was "Saya memang macam ni..." Dr. Mashitah then started scanning at the pelvic, after that the abdomen. I managed to turn my head towards the monitor to see how's the inside of my body looks like and trust me, I can't make head or tail what the image represents at all. It was all gray and black to me. But my hats off to these doctors who can really tell the different organs through such images.

As Dr. Mashitah was scanning the right hand side of my abdomen she said, "Awak ni kurus sangat sampaikan kidney awakpun saya boleh nampak jelas kat sini" Hahaha ... I know I'm thin but not THAT thin! I was thankful to God when she again confirmed that my liver and kidneys are in good shape. Only the uterus is slightly swollen and there's fluid in it. Your guess is as good as mine. How in the world did fluid get in there? But alas, I forgot to ask the doctor.

With the ultra sound done I was again called up for further discussion with Prof. Hatta. As what he had said earlier, operation or no operation the outcome is still the same. As for the fluid in the uterus he asked whether the oncologist would consider giving me a brachy - an internal radiation, through you know where... I replied by saying that I've an appoinment with them next week, I guess I'll find out then. Before ending the consultation, Prof. Hatta re-explained the situation about my case. I'll say it straight here although the good Prof. was very cautious with his words when he conveyed it to us.

The conclusion (as of now), is actually this. The Prof. is saying that he and his team has done about everything that they could do for me. My cancer is already stage 4. With or without operaton the situation will not change. So it's more or less up to me to whether go through with operation and risk the other good organs in my body or just leave it be with no guarantee that it won't spread in future. A catch 22 situation. What should I do?

But the Prof. did mentioned that if at any time I feel anything amiss or I suddenly find myself bleeding I must come and seek treatment back from HUKM, pronto. With that, he wrote me my next appointment in two months time from now.

I must really pat E-Ya's and my back during the discussion. E-Ya especially, did not burst into tears like she did the first time I was diagnosed with cancer. Kalau dia nangis hari tu, alamatnya akupun mungkin meraung jugak. Hahaha... Knowing that you're practically doomed is serious matter but we kept our calm. I have always told E-Ya and myself that whatever the outcome just accept it, as God knows better. I always console myself by saying God did not choose me to go through all this for nothing.

Even as we walked towards the carpark, E-Ya and me can still joked about my illness. E-Ya said, "Acik dengar tak Prof. Hatta kata tadi kanser Acik tu aggressive?" I replied, "Ya... so?" "Tulah, Acik ni masa sihat memang aggressive, dapat kanser sel pun yg aggressive jugak. Hebat betul" she continued. Hahaha ...

However in the car, E-Ya said something that I never thought would come out from her. As we were talking she suddenly said, "Life is just not fair" Huh, apa kena pulak budak ni... so I asked her, "What do you mean?"

"Yelah... orang lain tu ramai lagi yang jahat-jahat tapi tak de pun kena apa-apa. Hidup dia orang elok aje..." E-Ya, oh E-Ya. If you read this, remember again what I've always told you.

First of all, Tenkayuuu... sebab secara tak langsung kau acknowledge jugak akhirnya yang Acik kau ni baik yerrr... Hehehe...terkembang sikit. Tapi you shouldn't say that life is not fair, because as you know our life, ajal maut semuanya telah ditentukan oleh Tuhan. So when you say life is not fair, in other words you are also saying that God Himself is not fair. Nauzubillah. God picked us to go through all these because we are special, He knows we can endure it. In handling this situation, insyaalah God is guiding us as He wants us to become His better umat.

Alamak terlebih prasan ke ni? Whateverlah... tapi bukankah Tuhan akan hanya menguji umatnya dgn ujian yang termampu olehnya? So Tuhan tahu aku mampu menghadapi semua ini. Aku cuma concern because my illness has some way or another contribute stress to my family members especially si E-Ya lah since she is the closest to me. You see si E-Ya ni dijaga oleh aku eversince she was 4 years old. She herself has gone through a lot and I know my cancer tops it all.

As for me whatever the doctors have related, I accept it with open heart. No doubt it's hard for a patient like me to hear all this but I know it must be even harder for the doctors themselves to have to say all these things to patients. It must be frustrating to say to a patient something like, "Sorry, we have done everything that we could for you" when they know their duty is to save lives and not say that the patient has run out of chances.

I have no regrets at all. Knowing my situation is as such, does not mean that I will lose hope. I will still continue with my life and live it to the fullest. If modern medicine cannot cure me, maybe God can. Until the time comes for me to go, I'll do whatever it is that I can do. If that fails too, then so be it. Whatever happens I just pray to God that he gives me the oppurtunity to fulfill all my obligations first. I hope He grants me that wish. Ameen...

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Part I - Alahai Penang ...

It's been 3 days since we got back from our holidays (ewah... lagak bunyi mcm baru balik dr Switzerland jer kan? ... pergh!). Apa macam rasa nyer? Well ... ada yg seronok ada yg tak. Biasalah ...

Actually even before the trip starts, E-Ya dah prepare itinerary ... yes don't play play ... itinerary, wa cakap sama lu ... Dia telah melantik diri dia sendiri utk jadi program manager bg trip ni. Dia siap surf the net lagi utk cari tmpat-tmpt yg layak dilawati especially in Penanglah since dia tak pernah ke Penang lagi. Langkawi tu kurang sikitlah dia buat search sbb dia baru aje pergi ke situ last year so more or less she still remembers the attraction spots over there.

So dgn rajinnya dia pun catatlah hari ni buat apa, esok pergi mana, lepas bangun tido, sebelum bangun tido, kalau plan A tak jadi, apa pulak plan B nya, semua siaplah pendik kata. Semua dia dah taip dlm laptop ni. Siap dalam bentuk table lagi, ada headings spt Date/Time, Venue, bercolor-color. Begitu diligentnya dia membuat benda tu. "Gorgonize"nya mengalahkan Cik Kiah yg nak pergi rombongan ke Sukan Komanwel. Hahaha ...

Tiga hari sebelum kami bertolak, itinerary dahpun siap. Tapi, in the end tahu apa jadi? Ada ke masa dalam teksi on the way to LCCT, E-Ya yg duduk sebelah drebar teksi, pusing belakang cakap kat aku... "Acik, Ya lupa print out itinerary la..." Sabor je la... So dengan itinerarynya ntah ke mana, kami punya trip ni sebenarnya jadi semacam "hentam sajalah" punya trip.

First destination kami was Penang. Kami sampai airport dia lebih kurang pukul 2.40 pm gitu. Terus ke taxi counter sewa teksi airport utk ke hotel. Rm 47 itulah farenya. Kami rasa mahal betul especially bila dapat tahu distance airport dan hotel kami tu taklah jauh sgt.

Our taxi driver was a Malay man. Dia ni OK, tp there was something about him that worries me. No lah... bukan sbb muka dia mcm serial killer or anything like that. You see, at the airport itself masa dia dpt slip charter kami tu, dia tngok je terus dia keluar balik dr teksi pi kat teksi belakang, sort of like bertanyakan sesuatu kat the other taxi driver.

"Aii, nampak gaya driver kita ni mcm tak tahu jalan je ni" I said to E-Ya. And sure enough, mmglah sah-sah dia tak tahu. Our hotel which actually was an apartment, is in Tanjung Tokong. Jalan ke Tanjung Tokong drivertu tahulah, tp the exact location of the apartment tu yg dia tak tahu. Apa daa... So when we reached Tanjung Tokong, he had to stop three times to ask for direction. Mula-mula sekali dia stopped tanya kat satu Indian stall by the roadside, tanya mana apartment kami. Tokey stall suruh dia jalan lg depan. So off we went lagi ke depan. Then dia perasan jalan dah nak masuk Tanjung Bungah so once again he stopped. This time kat this one Malay restuarant and tanyalah kat tokey restaurant tu mana "Leisure Bay". Tokey restaurant tu pulak dgn confidentnya kata kami dah terlepas, kena patah balik, nanti kat traffic light, pusing kanan. So patah balik was what we did. Tapi usahkan apartment, bayangnya pun tak nampak...

Last sekali, taxi driver tu berhenti lg, kat another roadside stall. Kali ni dia tanya sorang mamat atas motosikal yg tengah berhenti beli rokok di situ. Mamat tu adalah bagi direction kat dia, tp kami tngok taxi driver tu mcm blur je. Agaknya mamat tu pun prasan, so in the end dia dgn murah hati offer utk tnjukkan sendiri di mana location sebenar apartment kami. Phew! Lega ... kalau harapkan taxi driver tu, mahu agaknya kami ni berjam-jam asyik pusing pusing Tanjung Tokong dalam taxi je. Dan nasib baik tambang dah fixed, taxi tak pakai meter.

So mamat tu pun naik motor jalan depan dan kami pun ikut dr belakang. Nak tahu apa yg berlaku selepas ini? Ini bukan cobaan...tapi betul betul kejadian ... Begini. Ingat td aku cakap kami ada stop kat satu restaurant utk tanya direction? Alah, tokey restaurant yg memberi direction dgn confidentnya tu laa.. Weren't we told that we've terlepas and had to turn back, traffic lights and bla bla bla....? Dey!!!... rupa-rupanya apartment kami tu betul betul belakang restaurant dia! And I mean betul-betul belakang ni... pintu pagar apartment tu tak sampaipun 20 meter dr restaurant dia. Tak ada apa-apa penghadangpun antara kedua-duanya. Siap tulis lagi nama apartment kat tembok sebelah kanan tu. Dari jalan raya tak nampak sangat, sbb tertutup sikit dek restuarant. Nak kata tokey tu tak tahu sbb dia baru buka business di situ, restaurant dia dah agak buruk. Nak kata pulak apartment tu baru tertegak semalam sampai dia tak tahu ttng kewujudannya, apartment tupun dari segi fizikalnyapun dah lama, paling paling dah tiga empat tahun dibina. Pelik bin ajaib betul tokey tu tak perasan apartment tu belakang restaurant dia aje... Hish!

Anyway we were relieved. At last we finally reached our destination. Kepenatan, dan kebengangan terubat apabila mendapati apartment kami memuaskan. Kalau tidak, mahu aku terbalikkan aje meja kat situ jugak. Hahaha ... Apartment kami ada dua bilik. Ada fridge, microwave, toaster, cooking stove, yg lain-lain tu standard mcm hotel hotel lain jugak. Swimming pool and gymnasiumpun ada. Dekat dgn amenities, within walking distance to Island Plaza. Apartment tu pulak bahagian dapurnya overlooking the sea. Walaupun agak jauh tp masih boleh nampaklah laut tu. Malamnya cantik, very breezy.

Dah letak beg and buat apa-apa yg patut, kamipun keluar utk makan. The last meal that we had was at LCCT and that was hours ago. So naturallylah sekarang perut masing-masing dah keroncong. Depan apartment mmng ada restaurant tu, tp ianya hanya dibuka malam. So we decided to walk to Island Plaza to look for food. Jangan haraplah kan kat sini nak jumpa pasemboq ka, cendoi ka atau laksa ka so we settled for a meal at Dome. Kalau ikutkan bukanlah aku suka sgt tempat-tempat mcm ni tp dah lapar, so hentam sajelah labu... Habih makan cost utk tiga org terbeliak bijik mata - RM 120an. Aku dan E-Ya buat bodo, so si Fizah kakak E-Ya lah yg terpaksa bayar. Hehehe ...

The next day we all charter taxi utk bawa kita orng jalan-jalan sekitar Penang. Mahal jugak but we've got no choice. Memandangkan tukang yg buat itinerary dah terlupa itinerary, so kamipun agak celaru jugak mana satu tempat yg nak dituju dulu. Tambahan pulak kami tak lama di Penang. So will it be Botanical Gardens? Chowrasta? Bukit Bendera? Fort Cornwallis? Tokong Ular? Butterfly Farm? Kuil Kek Lok Si? Bird Park? Or Permatang Pauh? (( Teringin jugak tu... ))

So fikir punya fikir dan memandangkan masapun terhad, we all decided to go to Bukit Bendera dulu. So early the next morning at 8.30 am we all suruh taxi yg kami charter tu ke sana. Di Bukit Bendera, it seems that we're the first to arrive. Orng lain tak de pun. Tapi kami OK je. Tak de orang lg bagus ... boleh posing-posing maut atas Bukit Bendera nanti.

Kami pun beli tiket dan lepastu terus ke tempat menunggu cable car. Tiba-tiba, "Awai ni. Cable car pun tak mai lg. Nanti pukui 9 stengah baru dia mai. Pi lah jalan-jalan di luaq dulu", datang dari mulut Pakcik tukang sapu. Adey! Tengok jam ada lebih kurang 40 minit lg. Mesti pakcik tu ingat kami begitu bersemangat nak naik cable car...

Kamipun jalan ke luar, tp nak jalan ke mana? Bukan ada apapun kat luar tu. Kedai pun baru dua aje yg bukak. Satu jual barang makanan ringan dan satu lg jual souveniers. Mahu tak mahu singgahlah jugak. Belek sana, belek sini adalah beli 3 fridge magnets dan 3 key chains. Lepastu tak tau nak buat apa dah. So aku cakap, "Kita tangkap gambar!", maka berlakulah adegan-adegan bodo di depan tembok yg tertulis "WELCOME TO BUKIT BENDERA" tu ...

Bila dah 9.15 kamipun pergi balik ke tempat menunggu cable car. Tengok-tengok dah ada satu gerabak yg sampai. Kamipun ambil satu section. 10 minutes later, barulah ada orng lain masuk. Foreingers and locals, all in all adalah kami dalam 12 orang satu gerabak tu. Naik cable car ni best jugak, dapat tengok Penang view. Udara pulak nyaman ...

Sampai kat atas lagi best. Memandangkan tak de org, as usual kamipun bebaslah tangkap gambar apa pose yg kami mahu. Kami posing merata. Kat tepi railing yg overlooking Penang ada, dekat fountain ada, kat meriam ada, kat pokok ada, kat tiang lampupun ada. Ada satu masa tu kami punyalah asyik berposing kat gerabak keretapi lama di situ, tak sedar rupanya ada sorang Uncle Cina dok asyik pulak merakam aksi kami dgn handphone dia. Aku yg perasan, bagi tahu kat E-Ya dan Fizah, "Wei, uncle tu tangkap gambar kita lah, jom blah..." Ntah kenapalah Uncletu nak tangkap gambar (atau video?) kamipun tak tahu. Tapi... kalau korang ada terjumpa kat You Tube tiga orng pompuan macam gila meroyan kat atas Bukit Bendera... haa... kami lah tu... Hahaha ...

Lebih kurang 1 jam berjalan-jalan kat atas Bukit Bendera, kamipun turun. Mulanya nak ke Botanical Gardens tp akhirnya cancelled. Budak-budak ni pulak tak nak pergi tmpat-tmpat macam Tokong Ular, Kuil Kek Lok Si atau Fort Cornwallis. Aku pulak dah pergi dah masa aku kecik, darjah 4 dulu. So kami minta aje suggestion dr taxi driver. Dia suggest pergi satu kedai ni - kedai jual kopi. Dia kata, "They sell the best coffee in Malaysia". Yeke? Nak tahu punya pasal, kamipun ke situlah. Rupa-rupanya kedai ni bukan jual kopi aje, teh ada malah coklatpun ada.

Masuk aje kedai kami diberikan sample kopi dan teh utk dicuba. Yg pelahap minum nya ialah Fizah sbb dia memang hantu kopi. E-Ya lebih suka teh dan aku pulak takut nak minum takut memudaratkan condition aku. Tp dalam takut-takut tu aku adalah jg minum mint tea dia, bolehlah tahan... 15 minutes later kami keluar dr kedai setelah membeli satu paket each of lemon tea, mint tea dan si Fizah pulak dgn white coffea dia. Masuk taxi aje tiba-tiba drivernya bersuara, "Ikut kajian, minum kopi ni bagus. Boleh elakkan diri dari kena kanser". Aii, macam dia tahu-tahu je aku ada kanser. Lagi pulak, betul ke maklumat yg dia cakap ni? Adakah mungkin kerana selama ini aku tak suka minum kopi maka aku kena kanser? Tak pernah pulak aku terbaca artikel macam gitu, tp aku diamkan aje. Menangguk setuju tidak, menggeleng membangkangpun tidak.

Lepas kedai kopi kami minta pulak taxi driver tu bawa kami ke tempat yg jual jeruk. Orang kata, (bukan aku kata ye...) kalau mai Penang, tak beli jeruk tak sah. Paling-paling kena beli buah pala dia. Tambahan pulak bila sedara mara tau yg kami nak ke Penang masing-masing dah siap-siap mengirim jeruk itu, jeruk ini. So off to Chowrasta we went. Dah borong jeruk, kami pun suruh taxi driver hantar kami balik apartment as we have to check out sbb free voucher kami hanya utk 1 night stay saja di situ. Kami akan pindah ke Copthorne Orchid, Tanjung Bungah pulak for another 1 night di sana. Yg ni belanjanya sendirian berhad tp sebab si Fizah ni member of Swiss Garden holidays, kami dapat room at discounted rate of RM 80 only.

Bila dah check in di sini, kami dah tak jalan-jalan dah. Ke pantai atau bazar malam di Batu Feringghi tak, makan ke Gurney Drivepun tak. Actually budak-budak berdua tu yg tak mau. Aku orait je nak ke manapun. Dia orng kata buat apa nak ke bazar malam, kat KLpun ada, makan hawker food pulak si E-Ya kata tak elok utk health aku. Sedihnya hati time tu...

Bercakap pasal makan, actually sepanjang dua hari kami di Penang ni, kami tak cubapun satu Penang delicacies yg selalu disebut-sebut spt nasi kandar, pasembor dsbnya. Walaupun teringin sangat, tp mengenangkan yg aku tak boleh sembarangan makan jd kena lupakanlah saja keinginan tu. Selain dari aku makan salad, fish and chips kat Dome hari tu, antara tempat-tempat lain yg kami makan adalah di BBQ Chicken. Di sini jg ada dijual white flesh fish dan masakannya semua menggunakan extra virgin olive oil, banyak salad and fruit juices. Pricepun tak mahal sangat. Satu lagi kami makan kat one local pizza outlet. Ada mushroom soup dan green tea. Cuma ada sekali tu aku nak jugak, so kami makan kuetiaw goreng, Penang style. Cari laksa tak jumpalah pulak.

Selain dr Bukit Bendera, cuma satu aje lagi destinasi yg kami pergi iaitu "Toy Museum" yg kebetulan mmng terletak di hadapan Copthorne Hotel tu aje. Kami dapat info pasal toy museum ni masa kami kat Bukit Benderalah. Ada sorang amoi datang bagi flyers kat kami. Bayaran masuk sorang RM 10. Masa kami masuk tu tak de orng lain. Betul. Masuk kami bertiga aje, time keluarpun kami bertiga jugaklah. Nak tahu kenapa? Sebab tempat tu indah kabar dari rupa. Dalam advertisement digambarkan tempat tu sikit punya gempak. Segala macam superlative digunakan utk memuji museum tu. Tp bila kami masuk, kami dissapointed. Walaupun mmng banyak toys and replicas di situ, tp maintainence wise tempattu failed. Dalamnya berbau, sempit dgn rak-rak toys diletakkan sangat dekat antara satu sama lain. Semuanya dalam glass casing. Ada satu dua patung Pharoah yg tak di letak dalam kaca. Floornya squeeky, in fact at one spottu almost macam nak cave in. Ada satu glass casing tu pulak senget nak jatuh, ditupangnya dgn tangga. Ada ke patut? E-Ya tak habis-habis merungut, "Eee... kita tertipu. Acik kita dah kena tipu ni.." Tapi memandangkan masing-masing dah bayar 10 henggit, posing-posing gaklah kami dalam tu utk memastikan yg our RM 10 each was worth it. Cuba korang bayangkan kalau kami yg local ni boleh criticise macam gini, apa lagi mat-mat saleh atau mat-mat Jepun. Mesti dia orng kata, "Piiirrrahhhh!" Err... by the way, mat saleh dan mat Jepun pandai ke cakap "pirrraah"?

The next day was check out time. Tp sebelum tu si E-Ya sempat pergi sauna dan jacuzzi kat hotel. Aku? Bersantai kat balcony yg mengadap laut, sambil minum dan baca paper. Macam orang kaya-kaya... Manakala si Fizah pulak dah mula diserang demam selsema so diapun apa lagi, tak de keje bergulung dalam selimut atas katil.

Flight kami ke Langkawi pukul 2.10 pm. Lepas check out dr hotel pukul 12 tghari, kami terus je ke airport. Dalam taxi E-Ya senyap. Tak de berbual-bual mcm biasa dgn driver taxi atau aku. Aku dah pelik dah. Aku tertanya-tanya dalam hati, "Kenapa budak ni, diam aje". Bukan apa, si E-ya ni kan mulut murai, jd kalau dia senyap maknanya mmng ada something wrong. Sepanjang dua hari kami charter taxi tu, E-Yalah paling peramah berborak dgn driver taxi Muslim yg berketurunan mamak, dipanggil Joe saja tu.

Si Joe ni selain boleh berbahasa Melayu, Tamil dan Inggeris, dia boleh jg berbahasa Arab. Masa mula-mula ambik kami dia asyik tersasul-sasul cakap omputih je dgn kami. Panggil aku pulak, "Maam". Kalau aku cakap, "Building kat Penang ni banyak yg lama-lama mcm colonial days punya building ye" Dia akan jawab, "Yes maam. Kan baru-baru ni Penang dpt Cultural Heritage punya status, so bulding tu semua kami preserve" atau kalau aku tanya, "Kat mana nak dibina jambatan P. Pinang yg kedua? Jadi ke projek tu ye?" Dia akan jawab, "Saya tak pastilah maam, sbb dengar cerita projek tu ada masalah". Sabar aje lah. Bawa taxi tak lepas dengan spek mata hitam dia. Sekali pandang mcm Sivaji the Boss.

Rupa-rupanya si E-Ya bengang sbb si Joe dah pandai-pandai main SMS dgn dia. Yelah E-Ya bagi no telefon dia kat si Joe tu bukan suruh siJoe main SMS dgn dia, tp supaya senang kami contact dia kalau ada apa-apa change in taxi schedule. Itu aje. Hari pertama tak de SMS lagi, tapi masuk hari kedua je siJoe hantar tiga SMS kat E-Ya. The first SMS berbunyi, "Hai Cik E-Ya. Boleh kita berkenalan?". Kuang kuang kuang... the second one pulak, " Nama saya Zulkifli and I'm 27 yrs old" Huhu... dan yg ketiga "Kenapa tak balas SMS saya?" Tu diaaa... Patutlah Si E-Ya bengang, diam aje masa dlm taxi. Dia kata menyampah betul. "Kalau nak bawa taxi bawa je lah taxi, apa pulak nak SMS-SMS orng?" Rungutnya masa dah sampai airport. Hehehe ...

Aku saja usik-usik E-Ya cakap, "Eh cuba bayangkan. Ntah-ntah dia bawa taxi tu part time basis aje. Sebenarnya taxi yg dia bawak tu taxi company bapak dia. Dia saja-saja tolong bawakan. Haa... kan cerah masa depan? Anak tokey taxi tu..." Apa yg aku dapat? Jelingan maut daa...

Even masa kami dah sampai Langkawipun rupanya si Joe ada SMS lagi, "Hope you have arrived safely in Langkawi"... Hemm nasib kaulah E-Ya. Agaknya dia tengok yg si E-Ya ni ada sikit-sikit rupa mamak sbb tu lah dia nak berkenalan sangat tu. Hahaha...

Ok, begitulah serba ringkas (ye ke ringkas?) cerita kami di Penang. On the scale of 10, I'd say that I rate the trip as a 6.5, oraitlah tukan? Langkawi punya kisah pulak in the next entry OK. Letih tangan nak menaiplah...